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Sunday, March 3, 2019

Forgiving your flaws. Embracing your virtues. 5 Stars for The Memory Keeper's Daughter.

The Memory Keeper's Daughter by Kim Edwards at its heart is about forgiveness. David, a doctor, husband, father, and once a child growing up poor with a sick sister makes the choice to give away his own daughter (Phoebe) because she is sick. She simply is born with Downs Syndrome a condition that results because a child is born with an extra chromosome. Notable characteristics of this condition are eyes that slant upward, short stature, and a flat nasal bridge.

Developmentally they are behind their peers and they often make poor judgements combined with impulsive behavior. They are prone to many health issues including heart defects that cause them not to live long; however, there are exceptions to this. David, the protagonist of the story and the memory keeper knows all the this the moment his daughter is born and he combines this knowledge with the sister who caused his family so much pain due to physical defects.

Once being drawn into this book because of the premise, I was further drawn into effects of David's choice to give his daughter away. I wanted to know if happiness and forgiveness is possible after such a choice. Edwards wove the human condition of not just David's feelings, but an intricate pattern of his wife's, son's, surrogate mother's, and finally his own tragic quilt piece into a beautifully odd blanket highlighted by Phoebe's open embrace.

A few years ago, I met a young man with Downs Syndrome and was lucky enough to be in his life on a daily basis for the course of one year. After knowing him, I concluded that his extra chromosome was like an extra sight into the human emotional psyche. He seemed to understand someones's happiness, sadness, and anger before even they did, and often he placed someone else's happiness above his own. He genuinely wanted to make those around him happy though his very simple and rose colored glasses. 

Often I have found myself cynical pondering the flaws of the universe I cannot explain. This young man was like rope in an endless space of darkness. He gave me hope reminding me not of vices but of virtues. Fortunately, his family saw him in the same hope filled light. Kim Edwards understood this with Phoebe, and it was why even the darkest secret can often be forgiven. If you want a story about real forgiveness, read The Memory Keeper's Daughter.